Job Application Funk

I'm in a bit of a funk today lady and gentle readers, a proper funk. Like I've fallen down a dark hole and can't pull myself out kind of funk.

I'll tell you why, earlier today I saw my old job being advertised on a job site via an agency. This was a civil service job and I immediately checked if it was advertised on the civil service site - it was. This left me with a decision to make and I'll explain why.

Over the years I have applied for a number of civil service jobs directly and never got one. Despite the fact I am qualified and experienced in admin and call centre management - I believe the fact I'm transgender is a factor in this. At one point in 2015 I applied to what looked like a civil service job via an agency, I firmly believed this was a fake job advert but applied anyway as a job could still come out of this. I registered for the job, interviewed for the job and got the job, mainly due to the fact the recruitment consultant was stoned out of her skull and didn't realise I was transgender.

During the time I was there, the entry level (fixed term) in the workplace was removed which would have been the next level I got promoted up to from a temp. I wasn't allowed to apply for permanently, a number of jobs I was experienced in and qualified for came up and I was unable to apply for them because I wasn't permanent or fixed term. Eventually after 15 months I was phased out due to the temp contract coming to an end. During this 15 months I managed a department over Christmas and New Years, trained countless staff and got nothing from it.

My choice is do I apply for this as a temp or directly. Directly I don't get in, this is plain fact, I have helped manage a department for this branch of the civil service but it counts for nothing because I'm transgender. I've got no choice but to apply for this job as a temp and hopefully get more than three months work out of it.

I should be firmly entrenched in this branch of the civil service by now, a few levels up striving to get back to I was before two decades of work placed transphobia killed my career. But I'm sat here typing a blog with only four hours guaranteed work this week.

Like I said readers, I'm in a funk.